What "embodiment" means for your sex and relationships.

Long distance hiking taught me how to be more embodied, which is a skill I am passionate about re-teaching.

Embodiment is the ability to listen to and be in your body in a more nuanced way.

When you’re having negative sensations in your body, you can try to make the bad feelings go away—or you can be curious about them and tune into what you physically or emotionally need in that moment.

Practicing self-awareness and presence helps you to become more attuned to yourself and to others. That’s why embodiment is the key to having connected, meaningful sex and intimate relationships.

Embodiment helps you know when your boundaries have been crossed in relationship. It also helps you intuit what your partners’ needs are.

This is because emotions begin as physical sensations in our bodies.

Becoming more embodied allows you to pick up on what your (and others’) needs and desires are at any given moment (which is called "attuned.")

If we are not attuned to ourselves, how can we be good lovers or get what we need in our relationships?

When I work with men, I always teach embodiment because it's something our culture puts more emphasis on for women than men. And that's a problem. Women want a man who is emotionally intelligent, aware and attuned...so learning the skill of embodiment is critical for male sexiness! Becoming more embodied takes a commitment to being present and listening to your body:

  • It might look like a practice of slowing down, closing your eyes, and taking time to notice your breath.

  • It might look like a practice of moving consciously, focusing your awareness on every muscle propelling you forward, every exhalation and the feeling of the ground beneath your feet.

  • Either way, it involves becoming fully aware of your senses and sensations. What are the smells around you? The sounds? Close your eyes and gently run your fingers over your bare arm. What do the tiny hairs feel like on your fingertips?

Regardless of what your #embodiment practice entails, I challenge you to commit to one this week and see what you notice.

You'll begin to see your relationships with yourself and others shift in a positive direction. 💫

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