I’ll never forget the first time I heard of “polyamory.”
I was sitting around with a few acquaintances over a decade ago when a woman, flipping through a NatGeo, casually said, “here’s an article about a tribe where people have multiple partners. It’s called ‘polyamory’.”
To her, it was a weird, interesting fact about a faraway community. But for me, it unlocked a part of myself I didn’t even know existed.
That was the beginning of my journey of embracing my desire to connect with more than one person.
If you’re also someone who struggles to fit into the monogamy paradigm, I get what you’re going through. We live in a culture where our authentic desire is seen as selfish and immoral. It feels almost impossible to talk about or meet other people who feel the way we feel. It seems more realistic to hide behind self-denial or cheating. Well, I am here to tell you that intentionally and honestly choosing to connect with more than one person is not wrong—and it’s not a new thing. It’s not for everyone—but for some of us, it’s natural. For some of us, it makes our lives feel richer, more authentic and more interconnected. And there are others like us out there.
When we choose romantic lives that are more intertwined, we are saying “yes” to re-communitizing our lives in a world that is becoming increasingly isolating and disconnected.
We are creating a culture in which everyone has a choice to express themselves and their sexuality however it naturally fits them.
We are actively building wider networks of loved ones in an era where loneliness is literally killing people.
Yes, it’s not always easy—but isn’t more love better than less? If you are curious about designing non-traditional relationships and finding community based on your authentic desires, listen to me talk about practical tools for ethical non-monogamy on the podcast The Love Drive. 💙